my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
i am craving dick and cupcakes
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
