I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I need a burrito and a hug.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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