dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
