Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
