North Korea, Best Korea!
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
