Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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