I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
