i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize
