wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
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