it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
