Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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