Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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