I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize