My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
