he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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