I just cut my nipple shaving
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
is that a dick in a sweater?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
