Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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