ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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