I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
