i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
