The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
