Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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