brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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