Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
