my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize