Moan for me like Helen Keller
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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