Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
