he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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