I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize