ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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