I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
