obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
