She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
