I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
