I bet he comes in French.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Randomize
