I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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