If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Buhtt sex?
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
