she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
