Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize
