she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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