if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
