I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
a search helicopter?!
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
