im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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