Don't you send me to vm
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
