Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
