I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
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