i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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