barbara walters just said penis...
Life is so much better after having sex.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Pants are for mortals
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
