next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
