I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
